Happoshu vrs. "Real" Beer

Well, this is a debate that started mainly with my friend Kelly Churko a long time ago. First of all, I'll explain what Happoshu is and why it's different from "REAL" beer. OK, Japanese beer companies produce "Happoshu," which is basically sparkling low malt beverage. The tax for Happoshu is much cheaper than "Real Beer" tax, so obviously happoshu is cheaper than beer. For example, a six pack of happoshu is around 750 yen (about 8 bucks Canadian I guess), a six pack of "Real" Beer is roughly 1,100 yen (around 12 bucks). For that reason, Happoshu has become very popular in Japan, especially with people who can drink a ton of beer, like myself. Happoshu classification occurs when an ingredient other than malt, hops, rice, corn, kaoliang, potato, starch, or sugar is used, or if the malt ratio is less than 67%.

Anyway, to me, certain brands of Happoshu are not much different than "Real" Beer. On the top of my Happoshu list is KIRIN and SAPPORO, they both taste fine to me. Actually, they taste better than any of Asahi's "Real" beers. Personally, I don't like and of Asahi's beer, including their Happoshu, which is pretty rough to swallow the first few cans.

On the other hand, some people, like Kelly, disagree strongly with me and say that Happoshu is pretty much piss. Anyway, that's just his opinion. Kelly is more of a connoisseur of beer than I am. He buys beer for the taste. To me, the most important thing about beer is the kick you get from it, meaning, that warm fuzzy red-faced drunken feeling of bliss where nothing really matters but anylyzing King Diamond lyrics and laughing hysterically at Gentle Giant's music, while imitating the singer, or after a few more cans, making the 'ol "in-out in-out" gestures on the couch upside down.

OK, I DO realize that "Real" beer is better than Happoshu, none of you have to tell me that, it's made using better ingredients. But hey, drinking Happoshu keeps it real. I'm proud to be a Happoshu drinker. So go to a kids park and crack one open NOW and start shouting insults at the kids and their moms like "You used to work for ME!!!!!!! Now look at you!!!" while your ass crack is hanging half out. Then whip it out and take a piss all over yourself, swearing insessantly. This is Osaka, so it's probably a normal occurance, and they'll just look at you for a second or two, then turn around and go back to what they were doing. Anyway, exercise your right to drink in public! If you're a Canadian, then FIGHT for the right to drink in public...