Sunday, September 30, 2007

BORIS Mania

I think everything that needs to be said about this band has already been said a million times, so i won't get into how awesome I think this band is. I mean, it doesn't get any better than a fucking noise/stoner/sludge band that also happens to have a amazingly gorgeous big-breasted guitar player (Wata) who looks so beautiful, but shreds so evil. Check out the album cover for "Feedbacker", it's truly woody-inducing. Maybe we'll be lucky and get a nude photobook of her included with the next CD.

Anyway, enough about my sick fantasies of mounting Wata. Let's get to the music. First of all, there's a shitload of releases. I mean a shitload. And there's like 30 versions of the same album, which make them a very collectable band. So you can easily go broke just collecting Boris CD's and LP's. Or you can just download their entire discography from a torrent file, which is pretty easy to find actually.

The first Boris CD I ever bought was Feedbacker, and i think that one's still one of my favorites. But I'd have to say my personal favorite so far is DRONEVIL, it's a 2-CD set, but you're supposed to play the 2 CD's on 2 different stereos simultaneously. Well, I don't have two damn stereos and neither do most people, so I just mixed the two discs in ProTools and burned everything onto 1 track. Aaahhhhhhh, DRONEVIL, it IS the shit. I get a metal boner listening this, it's the epitamy of doom.

My other personal favorites are FLOOD, ABSOLUTEGO, and AMPLIFIER WORSHIP. The aforementioned albums are all long drone concept albums clocking in at over an hour, and that's the BORIS I prefer at this point. I have 7 or 8 Boris CD's which is nothing, considering that many of their fanbase collect EVERY version of every LP and CD. I like too many other bands to be just a collector of BORIS. I've heard most of the other limited LP's and some of them are not necessary anyway. I downloaded mp3's of most of those and made handmade CD versions. For example, there are 3 volumes of "The Thing Which Solomon Overlooked" which are good, but not absolutely necessary. Also, there are 2 completely different versions of VEIN, a hardcore version and a drone version. They're good too, but not essential.

There's also an soundtrack CD to an imaginary film called "Mabuta No Uta", which is really nice. There's 3 or 4 versions of that i think, and to make things even more frustrating, each version has different packaging and tracks that can't be found on the other version(s).

If you don't like the long drone/sludge so much and just wanna hear some great Sabbath-like balls to the wall ROCK, pick up PINK, HEAVY ROCKS or AKUMA NO UTA (which is actually a good sampling of all their flavors, so a good place to dive in head first). Boris has a little something for everyone I think, and that's part of what makes them so unique. They're not afraid to limit themselves and each subsequent release shows them growing.

A few of my other current favorites is the Sunn O))) Boris collaboration "ALTAR" and the MERZBOW / BORIS collaboration aptly titled "Sun Baked Snow Cave".

Like I said before, you don't need to buy everything they've ever put out, but just about everything I've heard so far is good in some way or another. I'm really looking forward to hearing their new CD with Ghost guitarist, Michio Kurihara, I heard nothing but good things about it.

There's tons of information and resources on Boris, and just about everyone and his dog has blogged about them in some way, so that's why I'm gonna keep this post relatively short. You can start by checking out their website at http://homepage1.nifty.com/boris/

Friday, September 14, 2007

STAR TREK TOS HD DVD

Holy shit. Is this necessary? I already have the supposedly "remastered" STAR TREK TOS on standard DVD format, the ones that come in the hard plastic cases and those are just fine for me. I haven't even got around to watching ANY of the extras and I'll probably never get around to watching them all. So here comes another cash grab from Paramount Home Entertainment, announcing the US HD DVD release of Star Trek: The Original Series - Season 1 on 20th November 2007 priced at $217.99 SRP. Here's the description I lifted from another site:

"See The Original Series as never before when the legendary first season arrives for the first time ever in a 10-disc HD DVD/DVD combo disc set. Meticulously remastered from the original camera negative specifically for this high-definition release, each classic episode is presented in pristine condition with state-of-the-art digital visual effects. 1960s special effects have been replaced with 21st century computer-generated imagery to give new depth and atmosphere to various elements including the main title sequence, the galaxy shots frequently seen from the Enterprise's bridge, the battle scenes, planets and alien ships, some of the matte paintings used as backdrops for new worlds, as well as the Enterprise and other Starships, which have been replaced with state-of-the-art CGI-created ships. The new computer-generated Enterprise is based on the exact measurements of the original model, which now rests in the Smithsonian Institution in Washington, D.C.

The refurbished episodes also feature higher quality sound for the famous opening theme. The original score by Emmy Award-winning composer Alexander Courage has been re-recorded in state-of-the-art digital stereo audio with an orchestra and a female singer belting out the famous vocals. A digitally remastered version of William Shatner's classic original recording of the 38-word "Space, the final frontier..." monologue continues to open each episode.

In addition, the extraordinary set features true HD audio and exclusive HD DVD interactive features produced by New Wave Entertainment. Interactive menus and a "Starfleet Access" interface will allow viewers to activate icons which provide such features as Picture in Picture video commentaries and an interactive tour of the Starship Enterprise. Both the standard definition and high definition presentations also include rare on-set home movie footage, an inside perspective on what it took to transport Trek into the 21st century and much more. Finally the set comes housed in a futuristic clear case."


OK. Great. But I'm quite happy watching the original ones. I like the crappy cheap special effects and I don't need to see any added digital enhancements, thank you very much. This brings up the issue that arises AGAIN and AGAIN about adding digital effects to old movies. IT SHOULDN'T BE MESSED WITH. They're not even giving fans the whole picture. If you take a look at the startrek.com website and click on the remasterd episodes links you'll see pictures of the remastered effects shown in 1:85 ratio. There is plenty of room to construct a 1:85 frame from the original 35mm negatives of these shows. So probably in a few years, you'll see another WIDESCREEN version released saying that IT is the DEFINITIVE STAR TREK release. So it goes on and on.

I'm no rocket scientist, but wouldn't it be physically impossible to high definition version of a 40 year old show? This set will not look much better than the regular edition, which is selling for about 60 bucks now. Studios are basically ripping off consumers if they're releasing HD versions of old films. Would you buy an HD version of the original Dracula? No, I don't think you would unless you're a complete clod. HD reproductions of older films and TV shows will look even grainier than before, due to the fact that the computers responsible for creating the higher resolution output will attempt to compensate for the initial low-res by adding more pixels in the empty spaces. This has been proven by many people who've complained that "Blu-Ray" versions of older films looked worse than the standard DVD editions. This whole current trend of Blu-Ray and HD DVD is good for people who only like films that have been made in the past few years, but for people like me, the majority of films I watch are pre-1980, so Blue Ray and HD are useless and I can't understand why people are shelling out big bucks for these old films that have been "meticulously" restored to look like crap.

The only plus point I can see is that the package design looks pretty awesome, however, it doesn't in any way merit spending over 200 bucks. Keep your originals.

http://www.filmjunk.com/2007/09/04/star-trek-the-original-series-hd-dvd-features-revealed/

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

The education system in Japan, teaching kids, violent crime in Japan, suicide, murder, deterioration of Japanese society & other crap

Teaching kids is for the birds. First of all, it's not the kids fault. Stupid kid, stupid parent, right? Stupidity is inherited I believe. i live in Japan, and I teach kids only on Monday, and thank ____ for that. (I don't believe in GOD™, that's why I left a blank) I can't believe that some people do this all week, 6 days a week. Good Christ, I'd have been committed by now if I had to teach kids every day.

It seems to have been the trend in Japan for the last 5 or 6 years + and it doesn't matter whether kids are interested in learning English or not, they're pretty much forced to attend English classes as early as 6 months old! Learning a second language when they're young is the ideal time to to do it, but a 6-month old baby doesn't even have their own language figured out yet, let alone a foreign language. Parents should at least wait until their child is old enough to make that choice for themselves.

Parents in Japan just send their kids to English school because that's what their friends are doing, and their friends, and so on and so on. It's just another example of the ruthless competitiveness this country is known for. The thinking is that if their kids aren't going to English school, their friends think they're poor, or weird or don't care about their kids' education and future. What a bunch of shit THAT IS.

What really pisses me off to no end is that when the mothers bring their kids to school, they are chit-chatting and gossiping like it's a fucking café, and I have to strain my voice sometimes just so it's loud enough for the kids to hear over their mothers' mundane chatter. Japanese wives are very good at certain things and one of those things is waste their husbands' salary. At least if you're forcing your kids to go to school, please TAKE A FUCKING INTEREST in what your kids are learning. If you wanna chat, piss off with ya and go home.

The school I teach is not that bad actually. Yeah, there's some bad kids, stupid kids and just down-right evil kids, but it doesn't even compare to some of the horror stories I've heard from other teachers. If there's so much violence in school's these days, why isn't there a camera monitoring every classroom? Now, before you think that's a little "extreme", why don't you read a few little bedtime stories about things that have happened in Japan over the last few years.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A50678-2004Aug8.html
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16500163/site/newsweek/
http://www.breakingnewsenglish.com/0509/050924-violence.html
http://web-japan.org/trends98/honbun/ntj980401.html
http://www.japantoday.com/jp/news/384109
http://search.japantimes.co.jp/member/member.html?nn20051007f1.htm

Here's a few more little "news bits". some of them are not school related, but they are included just to give you an idea of the nature of some of the violent crimes in the last few years in Japan.

"TOKYO — 17-year-old boy stabs his mother to death. Having killed his mother as she slept, the boy cut off her arm and head with a saw. Spray-painted her arm white and stuck it in a potted plant. Put her head in a sports bag and carried it with him to an Internet cafe, where he spent two hours watching rap music videos in a private booth. He then took a taxi to a police station in his town in northern Japan, where he surrendered the head and told the officers, "It didn't matter who I killed." It's pretty hard to swallow such a story, but it's real, and this kind of shit seems to be going on regularly in Japan."

Over the last several months, there has been a series of killings in which the bodies have been cut up or disposed of in sickening ways. Who's to blame? TV? Violent Manga? Movies? Music? There's a huge sense that a country once bound by tight family values and community ties is deteriorating into something quite ugly indeed. Here's more...

"In December, a Tokyo woman confessed to killing her allegedly adulterous husband hitting him with a wine bottle and then cutting his body into pieces. The parts were found scattered across two city wards; his head was buried in a suburban park."

"a 21-year-old Tokyo man was accused of killing his younger sister. He claimed he lashed out violently after she belittled him for his failure to win acceptance to dental school. Police said he hacked her body into pieces and stuffed the parts into four garbage bags."

"In March, the strangled body of a young, female English-language teacher from Britain was discovered buried in a sand-filled bathtub in a university student's Tokyo apartment. The suspect eluded a police raid and is still on the run."

"Woman in Yokohama randomly stabs her 2-year-old child in a shopping mall."

"Couple accused of dumping their toddler son's body on a mountainside after he suffocated in the helmet compartment of their motorcycle."

"a 14-year-old killer deposited the severed head of an 11-year-old child at the gates of an elementary school in Kobe, and taunted police and citizens with threats to kill again before he was finally caught."

OK. Who's to blame? It's easy to lay blame on Japan's many social ills or America's negative influence, or even violent games, movies, music, manga, etc but I can't help thinking it's due to all this pressure and competitiveness brought on by Japanese society. Firstly it starts in the home, then secondly, in the schools. Kids are so pressured in this country to do well in school that some actually commit suicide because they fail a test, or they lose a game. And we're not talking just high school kids, we're talking about elementary and junior high school kids too.

Another fact you should keep in mind is that Japan has one of the highest suicide rates in the world. On average, over 80 people EACH DAY off themselves, most commonly by hanging themselves or by jumping in front of a train.

Here's a personal account of one of my students, and I'm not going to mention any names for obvious reasons. She's only 5 and she has been attending a special English school for the last few years, and her English is pretty good actually. Her English is good because she has been going to school from 9:00 in the morning til 5:00 in the afternoon 5 days a week and she can ONLY SPEAK ENGLISH in the classroom. Then, her mother also brings her to the school that I teach for another hour. I can't help notice her mothers' stern look the whole time, she never smiles and she watches her daughter like a hawk, just waiting for her to fuck up, so that she can scold her. You can even sense a certain fear in the child, when she answers a question. It's truly sad and i feel really sorry for the kid, because she hasn't been given any choice in the matter. This may just be one of those kids that grows up later in life and suddenly snaps because she's been carefully controlled her whole life, and now she needs to feel freedom...

The current school system in the U.S., Canada, Japan and many other countries has done little else than force schools to teach kids how to beat those standardized tests. It's a common complaint for young teachers that they feel like they've become a slave to this nonsense. Those tests are fucking meaningless and everyone knows it.

I see a tremendous failure of the educational system every day in Japan, bad system, bad teachers who don't give a shit about students, too many classroom hours, no interaction between students and teachers, many cases of teachers molesting and raping their students, it's fucking pathetic actually. I don't want to call kids stupid, because I don't think that's the problem, exactly. They're just so incapable of forming complete, written or spoken thoughts with actual grammar and correct spelling. There was an article in VICE magazine a number of years ago that reproduced a bunch of essays handed in by Grade 12 high school students in the U.S. and they were riddled with spelling errors, terrible grammar and incomprehensible script.

What's the solution? I don't know, actually, but I think parents can stop by letting their kids have mind of their own and stop forcing them into doing shit they have no interest in doing. (How man of you remember taking piano lessons?) One thing is CRYSTAL CLEAR. Many parents in Japan are just plain STUPID. And also, be a good parent and do shit with your kids, don't just leave them in their rooms playing Nintendo DS.

If the U.S. and Japan doesn't get their shit together, they will fall desperately behind the rest of the world. They already ARE falling behind. THIS IS a global marketplace now, y'know?

Tim Berne's Bloodcount Boxset

This is awesome news, so I thought I'd share it. Media: 2CD+DVD - STREET DATE 9/18. PLEASE NOTE: DVD IS 2-SIDED & INCLUDES NTSC+PAL! A double disc boxed set of UNRELEASED material from Tim Berne's legendary BLOODCOUNT quartet uncovered by TB himself & artfully mastered by DAVID TORN. BLOODCOUNT at its best w/JIM BLACK (drums), CHRIS SPEED (tenor, clarinet) & MICHAEL FORMANEK (contrabass). Includes 2 audio cds both recorded live in 1997 AND a DVD, brilliantly mastered by Bob Ludwig, of their legendary Paris concert in 1994 w/the addition of Marc Ducret on guitar. Can Screwgun be stopped? REGION=0.

Can't wait to seize this one. I hope it's not gonna cost an arm and a leg. I saw it listed on one Japanese site for almost 6,000 yen.

Thursday, September 06, 2007

tits n ass beer

Another classic spoof ad.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

evil beavers vs. miller lite

classic Miller Lite Ad from Swedish advertising geniuses, Traktor.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Jukka Bros.

Classic MTV ad. Wish i could find the other ones. There were a series of 3 or 4 I believe.

Reach and Frequency

I remember seeing this ad when I was working in advertising in Vancouver, and I thought it was hilarious. It's kind of a spoof of how free and crazy advertising agencies were in the 70's, with people sleeping around with other industry people. Great ad.

Spiders On Drugs

This is pretty funny. I remember these ads very well, and if you're Canadian I'm sure you do too. Sure brings back some good memories. I learned a lot of shit from those "Hinterland Who's Who" Interludes.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

FLUX DESIGN WORKS IS BACK UP

Sorry for the inconvenience. Hoping to get around to making a brand new site at some point in the future. Just haven't had the ambition to do much of anything in this maddening summer heat and humidity. Cheers! The Belch

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

LATE OZU

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

FLUX DESIGN WORKS IS DOWN

Having server issues at the moment, so the site will be down temporarily until I can figure out what's going on. I will probably switch from X-Server, which is a Japanese host, to a Canadian or American host, because every time I have a problem, I can't figure it out because all the emails or instructions I get are in Japanese and it's usually difficult "tech-talk" Japanese. I need a server that's easier to deal with. Sorry for the inconvenience, those of you who are trying to access my site. It'll be back up soon. Cheers...

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

SCRAPING FOETUS OFF THE WHEEL Re-issues

Well, shit, I just had no idea these came out a few months ago. I'm very happy about this. The 2 classic SCRAPING FOETUS OFF THE WHEEL albums, HOLE and NAIL have been re-issued by the Some Bizzare label. I used to have the originals but sadly traded them a few years back when I was living in Vancouver cause I needed cash. These have been OOP for a long time.

Those of you who are not familiar with the works of Jim G. Thirlwell, these 2 releases would be a good place to start. Monikers adopted at different times include Foetus Under Glass, You've Got Foetus On Your Breath, Foetus in Excelis Corruptus and Scraping Foetus Off The Wheel. After 1995 the name permanently became Foetus, though the related project The Foetus Symphony Orchestra was founded in 1997 and continues. It's truly a shame that such a genius is overlooked in popular culture. Doesn't matter what kind of music you dig, there's something for everyone in Foetus' music.

These 2 albums are considered Jim Thirlwell's more "accomplished" works, HOLE being full of intellectual savagery, NAIL being very musically refined with a grim atmosphere. This is intense music. I consider these to be landmarks in modern western music.

Also, this month Some Bizzare Records will be releasing the final two re-issues of Foetus: Thaw and Sink. Both releases will come as a digipak release and hold restored artwork under direct supervision from James George Thirlwell himself.

You should also check out the other works of Foetus, in my opinion they're all good. My personal faves are "Nail", "Thaw" and the 2-CD live "FOETUS IN EXCELIS CORRUPTUS - MALE. A new album tentatively titled Vein is planned for later this year.

Here's their full discography taken from Wikipedia:

Studio albums

Live, remix and compilation albums

EPs, singles and miscellaneous


Friday, July 27, 2007

NELS CLINE SINGERS: Draw Breath

Maybe some of you are unaware that Rolling Stone magazine has recently appointed Nels as a "guitar god," and I'd say I have to agree. There aren't too many other players out there at the moment that I could hold with such high respect. The only others that immediately come to mind are Allan Holdsworth, Marc Ribot, and Marc Ducret, who's best known playing with Tim Berne. Those are all players in my mind who have a very distinct voice and amazing control over the instrument.

That said, Nels Cline has come a long way since the 90's in the LA experimental music scene, now quite a mighty force among followers of progressive-minded guitarists like David Torn, Marc Ribot, Derek Bailey, James "Blood" Ulmer or Marc Ducret, just to name a few. It obviously hasn't been a bad thing that he's also worked with some pretty well-known names, like Tim Berne, Wilco, Charlie Haden, Vinny Golia, Thurston Moore,

Cline also has an enormous discography already. He's probably leads or appears on average, 10 albums per year or more His recent Andrew Hill tribute New Monestary came out in September of last year, Downpour with Andrea Parkins and Tom Rainey hit the street in April, Wilco's Sky Blue Sky was released in May, and just six weeks later, we get Draw Breath by his Nels Cline Singers.

Now, let's get another thing crystal clear. The "Nels Cline Singers" are not singers at all, they are a trio led by Nels + Devin Hoff (contra bass, bowed and plucked) + Scott Amendola (drums, percussion, electronic effects). While Wilco might be considered While WILCO is considered his "bread-and-butter" band, The Singers is probably his prominent vehicle for stretching out.

Draw Breath is the Cline album I've been waiting for since the duo with Gregg Bendian, which was a tribute to John Coltrane's Interstellar Space, which was pulled off with amazing results. It remains one of my top albums of al time. I have to say that although I like the first Singers release, there was simply just something missing. Then he released The Giant Pin a few years ago and I was really quite disappointed with that one.


The opening track "Caved-In Heart Blues" is a beautiful beginning to the album, with a "smoking peacepipe with Indians in the desert" atmosphere. Awesome. In the next track "Attempted", it starts out as free-form bop but it's not long before the sickness comes in. The tornado has begun. "Confection" is a straight ahead rock 'n' roll for the first minute until it gets unhinged by a softer interlude led by Hoff's cello, then it gets going again with an awesome Cline solo.

"An Evening At Pops'," a showcase for the drummer it's named after, is a sixteen minute centrepiece of the album. For most of the time, it's a stew of Cline's feedback and distortion, clanging bells, electronics and Hoff's dissonant bowed Arc bass before it simmers down to some nice ambience. The following track "Angel Of The Angels" is just a nice slow tune filled by Cline's rich 12 string, setting a nice mood after the cacophony of the previous track.

The calm/storm effect emerges again with the acoustic guitar-led soft number "Recognize I" followed by another explosive, free-jazz track "Mixed Message," at least explosive for the first half. "Recognize II", a semi-reprise of the first "Recognize," serves as another wind down tune. The last track "Squirrel Of God" is mostly random noises and Cline's pulsing guitar, but it's actually my least favorite track, doesn't really go anywhere.

Draw Breath. Buy the ticket. Take the ride...

http://www.nelscline.com

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Cucumber Pepsi, Bubbleman, Bilk and other weird drinks in Japan

I finally tried the limited edition Cucumber Pepsi a few weeks ago and it's actually not as bad as it looks or sounds. It doesn't come close to the classic regular old-time Pepsi taste we all love and know, but it's got a pretty interesting flavor and aftertaste.

Recently Coke and Pepsi has put out zero calorie versions of their soft drinks, Coke Zero and Pepsi Nex respectively, and they both suck. I hate Nutrasweet or whatever that fake sugar shit is they put in it. Face it, real sugar tastes good, it's fattening, but it tastes good and can't be replaced with some crummy substitute.

I don't drink soft drinks as much as I use to, I just don't care for them anymore, but one drink I fucking love is Bubbleman. Bubbleman has made somewhat of a comeback in the last couple of years. It's so funny because the fact that there's not just BUBBLEMAN, there's fucking sequels to this drink, BUBBLEMAN II., etc etc. I think there's like 8 or 9 different kinds. (See the pics) I know there was Coke and then the New Coke, then Diet Coke, etc. but this has got to be the first time that a beverage has gotten a sequel. I've never seen Coke II or Pepsi III, that's why this drink is so awesome.

There's a whole culture surrounding Bubbleman, it's not just a mere soft drink. The soda itself is extremely sweet, but the can and bottle designs are pretty crazy. Check out the pics. The basic story is that Bubble Man is from "Soda Planet." There's an interior view of their rocket, and the guy labeled "Captain Pilot" is sitting on the shoulders of a guy labeled "Assistant." There's another shot of the two guys in a spaceship with their legs and feet hanging out through the holes. Just check out the website and you can even read a monthly online magazine called B-STYLE dedicated to the soda loving space man. It's all in Japanese, but you can still see how ridiculously crazy the whole concept is. Bubbleman just kills the competition.

Also, recently Suntory has put out another retardedly sweet soft drink called BINGO BONGO which I just tried the other day when I was camping in Wakayama. It's really good too, maybe even better than Bubbleman, again their is beginning to be a whole subculture arising from the release of this soft drink.

The next weird drink I'll talk about is BILK, which has been successfully produced at a Hokkaido based brewery. It's a low-malt beer with milk, after the drink was suggested as a product that would help use up surplus milk. It reportedly has a fruity flavor that its brewers hope will be popular among women. The idea for the drink was conceived after dairy firms threw out a huge amount of surplus milk in March last year. The son of the manager of a liquor store in Nakashibetsu, whose main industry is dairy farming, suggested the idea of producing the milk beer to local brewery Abashiri Beer. Since one-third of the drink is milk, the drink has been viewed as a good way to use up milk in the town. Each 330 ml bottle goes for 380 yen. As far as I know, it's still only sold in Nakashibetsu, with six liquor stores selling the drink. I don't really know if I want to try it anyway, it sounds pretty gross.

Now, the last drink I'm going to mention just looks completely disgusting, it's a fucking kimchi drink from a company called Coolpis, not exactly a great name for a beverage. This stuff is made in... you guessed it... Korea. If you have the balls to try this, I'll drink my own urine to prove my worth.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

A Fine Frenzy - One Cell In The Sea

Damn, I gotta say I'm pretty impressed with this album. This is a totally new band to me and I just picked this CD up on a whim, I just had a feeling that this was going to be good and bet your boots it is. Rarely am I so impressed with a debut pop effort, I think the last time was Dot Allison's debut CD, Afterglow.

Anyway, every tune is good. The songs have a very haunting and subtle beauty reminding me a bit of Beth Orton's music, a little Tori Amos, and a little Sarah McLaughlin. Can't help but hearing some hints of The Sundays as well. Alison Sudol's voice is absolutely yummy. She wraps herself around each tune perfectly. By the way, she's drop dead beautiful as well, I can't help but getting a bit of a woody when I hear her and look at the album cover shot of her. Anyway, my woody is not as important as the music itself.

To me, they're all standouts, there's no filler here. Just buy it, you'll fall in love with this band. Also great artwork by Alison Sudol with the help of some other fine people. This is just a perfect debut. Can't wait to hear more...

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Weird Sex in Japan

The porn industry in Japan is a multi-billion dollar industry that shows no sign of slowing down. Japan is a country where there is some extremely weird shit going on which makes other countries look tame in comparison.

The fucked up thing about Japanese porn is THE CENSOR - it’s illegal to show bush or cock without that damn blurry mosaic. Japanese officials even go to great lengths sorting through foreign imported porn with a black felt pen to make sure no foreign penises make into the Japanese market either. The censor was introduced during the Meiji Era to “protect public morals”, but when WWII was over, it was one of the few laws the Americans decided to keep.

On the other hand, it's totally OK to show someone's anus. Judging from some Japanese films I've seen, it's also totally OK to show extreme gore and violence too. You just can't see some guy's John Thomas or a woman's forest. Pretty stupid, right? Oh, this is just the beginning...

I wouldn't consider the stuff I'm going to explain from here "porn" , but all of it is readily available and can easily be found alongside regular porn and is clearly spank material for somebody out there.

The fist kind I'm going to explain is the "Lolita" or sometimes called "Lolicon" and Junior Idol. There's a slew of these type of books that come out on a weekly basis, usually around 30 bucks a pop. (no pun intended) Softcore child porn was actually legal in Japan until as recently as 1999, when international pressure forced Japan to take action.

Their action?Instead of softcore child porn, the market redirected it’s attention to junior idol photobooks and DVDs. While most junior idols are around the 11-16 age, some such as Nanami or and the recently popular Irie Saaya have started off their modelling career as young as 6. The DVDs and photobooks showcase the young models in a variety of uniforms and swimsuits, some mostly harmless but others can get some pretty racey, but never nude.

In Canada or the U.S. many of these books would be banned immediately without question. But Japan is a country with a serious lolita complex. Things get even weirder within the junior idol collection like the young girls dressing up like cats, playing weird tag games, or acting like babies sucking their thumb. Later in their career, they usually go on to make shitty girlie j-pop music. I think very few get into the porn business, thankfully.

Perhaps it can be argued that the existence of junior idol video material etc. satisfies some people's desires, rather than forcing themselves on real children. Hmmmm, when I think about that really hard, I don't agree. Hentai manga, for example, is commonly read by your average dude on the subway, and raping small girls is a common theme in these comics. Japan has one of the highest child abuse rates in the world, and I think Manga is partly responsible for this. It's really hard to pinpoint one thing that makes Japan such a fucked up culture, but I think the wrong message is Definitely being sent out.

Next up is bestiality porn. This is not really new to Japan, but what's fucked is that it is sold over the counter just like any other porn, where as in Canada or the States, it can only be found in the black market. This is where things get really fucked. It's not just dogs that are getting some action. Eels, worms, frogs, goldfish, sea cucumbers, and even Octopus have their own little niche market cornered. Like the appropriately titled “Morale Lesbian Wriggles and Cumming Octopus Wriggles”

Now HERE's where I draw the line. SCAT VIDEOS. If you don't know what SCAT is, weeeellll, probably you don't want to know and you should skip this paragraph. These are videos in which people perform many different bodily functions on each other, like pissing, shitting, you name it. Then sometimes they chow down on the resulting excrement like it's a birthday BBQ. Again, these videos are right alongside normal porn. I've been to some used CD & DVD shops in Nipponbashi and sometimes they have fliers advertising the shit videos, which any kid could easily come in and pick up. As another interesting sidenote, most "used" shops have normal videos or CD's on display outside the shop, then you go in and there's a very small section of normal family movies, the rest is porn.

If you’re into this weird shit, you'll love Japan. It's a bit much to handle sometimes. I mean, whatever happened normal sex? Like, you know, you get down on your GF or wife, she gets down on you, then you just do the 'ol in-out in-out for 20 or 30 minutes. Missionary, Doggy-Style, sideways, her on top, whatever. Why do people need to shit on each other or get tied up to get off. I dunno, maybe I'm just missing out on all the fun. Anyway, I hope this was informative and entertaining.... Check ya later.